Sunday, August 16, 2009

How the Flour City Brewery Festival Tried to Destroyed my Body

The Brew Fest was a blast last night! We tried almost every beer and had some more than once. At first we were a little nervous when we saw the lines, but a line filled with about 20 people lasted only 2 minutes. You waited, gave your glass to the person with a keg, said "thank you" and moved along to the next line. In line you drink what you have in your glass. Sometimes the line would go too fast and you'd have to chug your beer because it was your turn for more free, tasty beer! Oh and wine too! The place was full of happy douche bags, drunk cougars and everyone else in between. We all understood one another: get in, get out and keep moving. Surprisingly there were no fights. Just beer lovers in a world of paradise. But paradise has to end eventually right? When you're up you have to come back down.

And that's when I'm pretty sure I tried to poison my body last night with all the beer, cloves and cigarettes. I used to be able to go all night and be up by 8am feeling like a million bucks. Not so much anymore. My body has gotten used to being pampered and treated as it should. Today I feel like someone tore out my throat and everything attached to it down to my stomach, poured some ajax down it and then put it back as they found it...hopefully. I forgot why I stopped smoking while I drank, this morning I remember. And I'm sure I'll remember for the rest of today because when I talk I sound like the woman from Beetlejuice that smoked through her neck. Oh and the taste of Marlbro that is sticking to the inside of my mouth like a bumper sticker you've been trying to scrap off your car but it's just baked on there from the sun. Water. Lots of water. It's the only way I can apologize to my body for what I put it through last night.

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