Don’t Dress up as Judge Ito for Halloween

During the mid-90’s, right in the heat of the O.J. Simpson trial and one cool October night, I decided to dress as Judge Ito for Halloween. I was in seventh grade and while some may consider thirteen too old for trick-or-treating there was no denying my love for candy. I had my black wig, my mom’s old graduation gown, small glasses, a goatee and a giant pillow case.

My friend came over dressed as a baby and we intended to visit every house in my neighborhood. Really load up on the candy. We made it to every house and with good time! In fact, it was still early. Our pillowcases were already swollen with candy, bulging in all directions but I easily convinced her to travel across the street to another neighborhood to get more candy. We started in a small cul-de-sac that had about five houses curved in a row. When we rounded the corner of the last house a few high school boys, some wearing robes and masks, came running around the corner. My friend ran to the street while I stopped, like an idiot, and said, “Oh! You scared me!” I remember being confused right before they grabbed my arms. One boy tugged at my pillowcase, now just over half full, and I tugged back. I wasn’t worried at all about getting beat up by four boys…I didn’t want to lose my candy. Once they realized I wouldn’t let go two of the boys kicked my legs out from under me. I saw my friend standing in the street laughing at me while I fell down to the ground. They boys held me down for a few seconds while some got a running head start…with my candy.

“Thanks for helping!” I sarcastically yelled at my friend. My Ito goatee was half off my face and I was pissed. I dreaded going home. I shouldn’t have been so greedy. I’m sure three pounds of candy was more than enough. I caught my breath and we walked back to my house. When I walked in the front door my dad was standing in the hallway, on the phone with my grandpa. I tried to hold back tears but I just couldn’t. I swear steam came out of my dad’s ears when I told him what happened. Once he heard my candy was stolen he put the phone real close to his mouth and sternly said, “Dad, I have to call you back, some fucking assholes stole her candy……..I don’t know, but I’m going to get those fuckers.” Click.

My mom came running into the room by now.  “What happened?!” she asked with a worried face. Her eyes looked me up and down and doubled back to my hands. “Where’s my pillowcase?!” she yelled. She was more upset about her pillowcase being stolen than the safety of her daughter.  My dad left during this argument to go find his police search light. “I can’t believe you’re upset about a pillowcase,” he said to my mom as he returned. “Come on, we’re looking for them right now! You’re going to tell me what they looked like, we’re going to find them and get your candy back. Get in the car!” I was nervous. I tried pleading with him to just stay home, that I shouldn’t have gone into that neighborhood in the first place but I was still sitting shotgun, listening to my dad talk about “how those fuckers are gonna pay.” We drove around like sketch balls for a few minutes, driving no more than 10 mph and shining a giant spotlight on trick-or-treaters. I was humiliated and I never saw the boys that jumped me and took my candy again. My dad took me to the store that night and gave me twenty bucks. Maybe getting jumped while being dressed as Judge Ito on Halloween wasn’t so bad after all…

New York City and Halloween: A Success Story

I didn't mean to be absent for so long, but I broke my finger about 5 weeks ago now and I am finally not in pain...typing is hard with a broken finger!

Anyways, I'm on the road to recovery and have been missing my blog. Here's what happened since I've been gone:

About a week after breaking my finger I drove to NYC with my best friend. We stayed right in the city, about a block away from Times Square. I had been to the city a few times prior to this trip, but never actually stayed in the city, so I was beyond excited. The first night we went to a bar and we met a very interesting character. His name was Ian. He was from Scotland. And he made a very good living being a lawyer in the city. His accent charmed us immediately and he bought us a few rounds of shots. He danced to Lady Gaga's "Pokerface" and by the end of the night he kissed me. It was a weird thing that probably shouldn't have happened, but it did and we both just pretended it didn't happen for the rest of the night...or I just blacked out from drinking, the rest of the night is a haze.

The next night we went bar hopping in the west village. I loved the bars, Washington Square Park and the little stores in the village. It felt like home. We only made it to three bars, but all three were fun! The first one sold PBR and was decorated for Halloween and they did a stellar job at it, in fact I wonder if it just always looked that way in there. The second (my favorite) was like a pub with old church pews for booths, artwork made from bottle caps on the walls and there was a fabulous tin ceiling overhead...not to mention an excellent beer selection. The third bar was more like a fancy strip club with no strippers, it was dark with red light bulbs, there were big fancy couches and end tables everywhere, all the drinks came with fruit and the music made you want to vomit slightly....but in a good way.

Our last full day in the city had to be one of the best days of my life. The things I saw that day were so inspirational and unforgettable. It started out with our first stop, The Dakota. The place where John Lennon and Yoko Ono lived in New York and also where John Lennon was shot. For those of you that don't know, I am a huge Beatles fan, standing in a spot where John Lennon resided and lost his life was surreal. Part of me was excited that I was looking at a building where one of the Beatles lived. I wondered which window was his, who was living in his apartment now? Then I felt sad that I was looking at where he died. The feeling was powerful.

After that we entered Strawberry Fields where the Imagine memorial lies on the walkway of Central Park. It was quiet except for a man sitting on a bench playing a guitar and singing. People crowded around the tiled circle with the word 'Imagine' in the center. One woman put a teddy bear down by the 'I'. I took a picture and then soaked up what I was doing at that moment. It was very emotional and way too nice of a day to waste on tears, so we kept walking. Central Park was gorgeous and everything I have ever wanted.

Right around sunset we stopped to finish our coffee at Washington Square Park. We sat at the edge of the fountain with our feet almost in the water. There was about five guys behind us playing Neil Young songs. I'm a huge Neil Young fan and quickly got up to listen to them. The man singing, a balding black man with glasses, had the most beautiful painful voice I have heard in a long time. There was so much feeling behind every word he said, he put tears in my eyes. As that man sang "Helpless" he took everything bad away from me. It was the perfect ending to New York City.


After New York City came Halloween! I made a Ms. Pac Man costume and after being violated all night (I had an open mouth at my stomach, so much was put in there...) I won the contest at the Halloween party I went to! Yay!

Little Adolf

I have no words. While looking up Halloween costume ideas I came across this picture.

Big Movies and an even BIGGER time gap

I forgot for a moment...or a few years, that I had a blog!

I'd fill you in on what happened while I was away from here, but it's too depressing and long and probably rather boring. I can tell you though that I am excited about a couple films coming out in the near future. Big names are coming out with big movies and that makes me one happy girl. Tim Burton, Sam Mendes, Mike Judge, Q.T., Robert Rodriguez!!!! While I'm off dreaming, check out the movies for yourself.

Alice in Wonderland directed by Tim Burton. This is one film that I've been highly anticipating. I'm curious to see Hathoway in a Burton film, but then again...as much as it's a Burton film, it's a Disney film. The costumes, make up, special effects all look amazing, but I'm a little concerned for the overly cartoony chesire cat. I'm hoping it's better than Charlie and the Chocolate Factory...it's gotta be, right?

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus from mastermind Terry Gilliam. Heath Ledger's last film. Ledger passed away about 1/3 into filming leading into Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell and Jude Law to step up and take control of his character in three different perspectives. Sounds interesting. Looks fucking awesome. This is going to be insane.

Sherlock Holmes directed by Guy Ritchie. Sherlock Holmes looks a bit hokey, but I love me some Robert Downey, Jr and although the movie may be cheesy...it looks fun.

Away We Go directed by Sam Mendes. Seems like an odd film for Mendes, but I'm still drawn to it. Kind of like a romantic comedy...Juno style but with more adult overtones.

Halloween II written and directed by Rob Zombie. As soon as I was losing interest in the horror genre because of all the shit thats been coming out of Hollywood, Rob Zombie came along and swept me off my feet. He's earned a spot in my top directors. John Carpenter's Halloween is my all time favorite horror film. I thought Zombie did a solid job at remaking a classic and I'm stoked to see how this one came out.

9 from new director Shane Acker. Produced by Tim Burton and there's no question why. This animated film has that dark, creepy...yet comforting Burton feeling to it. Not to mention a star studded cast! Storyline seems interesting and the graphics look amazing.

Machete from mastermind Robert Rodriguez. From what started out as a mock trailer for Planet Terror, Rodriquez decided to make it the real deal. He has such a dark, gritty and creative mind...what's not to love? There are two words used in the film description that made me go goo-goo-ga-ga: SAVAGE and SLAUGHTER. ;)

Inglourious Basterds from Tarantino. Oh my, my, my. Quentin has done it again. The reviews for this movie are outstanding! I'm hoping to see this within the next week or so.

Extract written and directed by Mike Judge. Yes, Mr. Beavis and Butthead, Mike freaking Judge! Extract seems to be more like Office Space than Beavis and Butthead though. Looks hilarious and has a fun cast.